Some ramblings on food

We are now finishing the third week of our foray into unconsumerism, and things seem alright, no hints of dissension in the ranks, no slips, no secret trips to malls or Costco or restaurants. Then again, the year is still young, and my coworkers brought in donuts every day this week. It doesn't take much strength to resist the siren call of the cafeteria when donuts of every dough, icing, sprinkles, and filling are available. What I fear most is that, after the gluttony of the holidays, when I ate tasty foods nearly every day at work, it will be tough in the afternoons when my stomach yearns for some cake or cookies and a fresh cup of coffee. I fear I'll look into my crumpled lunch bag, see only a healthy granola bar, and then my will will weaken. Food, I fear, will undo my resolve. For me at least shopping of the usual variety has never played a significant role in my daily life or functioned as a means of self-reward or indulgence. But I do love my coffee shops, my restaurants, my impulse purchases of chips or cake.

So far, though, I have enjoyed preparing lunches and dinners, which has surprised me. As an occasional activity, cooking pleased me; as a regular duty, it had never enticed me. What i appreciate about "not buying it" is that it has forced my hand on many issues. No longer do I wish I'd cooked and berate myself for simply buying my lunch at work. I just put together something in the morning and hold on till I get home. (My lunches are usually rather pathetic, whatever I can see quickly in the fridge, but I have high hopes as the year progresses. My breakfasts are improving now that we shop more regularly: omelets several days this week.) Likewise, when I stroll down the hall at work past the vending machine, I no longer muse on whether to buy Doritos "just this once." It's not an option. This not-buying-it resolution actually removes my usual challenges and stumbling blocks because where there was a decision to be made before, there is no possibility to tantalize me. Sophie and I have imposed a constraint on our lives that removes a whole range of possibilities, but in turn it is allowing me to explore possibilities that I had essentially blindered myself to and protecting me from choices that I tended to "lose."